What person should you NOT be when networking? Let me give you a clue. You DON’T want to be the person that people want to move away from (in person), or block or unfollow (online).
Of course nobody wants to be that person intentionally but there are certain behaviours that tend to turn us off and move us away from people.
We recently asked some of our community: What is it that frustrates you most about networking events?
Here are some of the common themes:
Serial Networkers
Those that rush around as though networking is a numbers game. Their game is to meet as many people as they can.
Hold it! More is not better. Better, is better. Names are not a network. People that you’re connected to who are interested in each other mutually – that’s a network.
Slow down. Be prepared and be focused on what type of people you want to meet and connect with.
Pitchmeisters
These people are in a hurry to tell you about themselves without knowing if you really care/are interested. How does this look online? This is the person who’s tweets/posts are all ‘me, me, me’. Following them quickly gets boring.
Intersperse broadcasting with listening. In the book Twitter means business – How microblogging can help or hurt your business, the author talks about being more like an intercom than a megaphone. The intercom has two way conversation – engagement. The megaphone, well – it can sure be loud, but the information is only going one way.
Card Dealers
These are the people who hand out their cards as though they were a card dealer at the casino. You’ve seen them. They’ll even approach tables of strangers, not say a word but put their cards down at each person’s place (and probably then hope for a miracle).
The bad news is, nobody wants your card unless they are interested in you. It’s old-school (and a waste of paper) to exchange cards or information before there is an interest in doing so. Exchange a card IF there is reason to follow up. Not every conversation will need a follow up.
Business Cards don’t build relationships. People do. So, start building some real relationships.
So, what are the qualities of good networkers?
Let me quote Aussie author Lisa Butler, who wrote Networking Exposed.
She says:
Good networkers
1. have a networking strategy and keep records to track, monitor and maintain regular contact with the people in their network
2. focus on helping others, rather than themselves
3. are genuinely interested in other peopel and generate positive and memorable impressions
4. interact well with a wide range of peopel and develop warm and valuable relationshiops in a short space of time
In a recall of the childhood show Romper Room… here’s the fundamental Do Bee and Don’t Bees:
Do Bee
– personable, inviting, interested and interesting, engaging
Don’t Bee
– pushy, one-sided, a ‘megaphone’ sending communication in one direction
