My word of the week is “digi-douchebag”. I picked it up from Petra Starke, a contributor to Techly. Apart from perfectly summing up what she calls “obnoxious behaviours” on social media, the fact that we need such a word shows just how distressingly angry Australian society in general has become. Over the last six months, I’ve noticed Facebook and Twitter especially being used less to socialise and network and more to air grievances, get revenge and “prove I am right”. And I’m talking equally about business pages and personal accounts. Have you noticed it too? It’s an important reminder as small business owners and business professionals that our social media profiles are the most powerful way our reputations are built … and broken. So at a time when most people agree Australians are getting angrier, it’s time to check what we’re posting. Here are four tips to help you avoid mistakes because in our modern world. You are what you post.
1. Your business and personal profiles aren’t separate
Modern customers like businesses with personality and, for small businesses especially, that means they want to know who you are as the face of that business. Whether you’re the owner or a key employee, you are an essential ingredient in your social media marketing. Chances are, many of your social media fans or followers know you personally or at least know who you are. And in their minds, there is no distinction between your personal and professional lives. This is why rugby star Todd Carney was sacked over the infamous “bubbling” photo on Twitter. For fans, Carney and the Cronulla Sharks were one and the same, and the club’s management couldn’t abide the lewd connection. So if you wouldn’t post it or comment using your business account, don’t do so on your private one.
2. Angry posts get more comments, but not more fans
Statistics show that engagement goes through the roof on angry or inflammatory posts, but at what cost? When you have business social media accounts, you set yourself up as a public figure and someone with authority … and Australians expect such people to be objective and have an even emotional keel. To show otherwise jeopardises your credibility and dignity, and brings your ability to deliver a product or service into question. As the Todd Carney example shows, everyone has something to say about a provocative situation, but I bet the Sharks gained no extra fans nor sold extra tickets to games!
3. What does your anger really say about you?
Our anger says more about us than we realise. In fact, it’s often far more about our values and state of mind than the incident or topic in question. Self-reflection is tough, but next time you’re tempted to lash out on social media or respond aggressively to a controversial topic, ask yourself why you need your opinion or side of the story heard:
- Are you having a self-pity party or need sympathy? If so, the real problem might be that you’re insecure or self-centred.
- Do you always have to be right? If so, you might need to grow your emotional maturity to find true happiness and satisfaction.
- Do you want revenge because you feel slighted? If so, you’re motives are questionable and likely to backfire in the long run.
- Are you being aggressive or rude simply because someone else has been aggressive or rude first? If so, you’re on shaky ground … your morals need to be the foundation of your life, not something that changes depending on the behaviour of other people or how someone treats you first.
I make these points simply because studies show venting online doesn’t solve the problem. In fact, while we may feel good for a few minutes, we’re likely to feel guilty and just as angry after 30 minutes, and may have ruined our reputations in the process. What’s more, research shows that angry (or mean or vengeful) people aren’t happy people, so you owe it to yourself to work out and resolve the real problem, so you can get on with making a better life for yourself.
4. Create a checklist to keep yourself out of trouble
Our emotions are unreliable and, left unchecked, can get us in all sorts of murky situations. So come up with a set of rules for your social media engagement. Don’t:
- Swear or use derogatory words
- Bitch about or slight people
- Air your dirty laundry
- Make generalised statements that cannot be backed up without firm evidence
- Post when you’re stressed, tired or have been drinking alcohol
- Brag or post to make your life look better than it is
- Bring other people into arguments or prove a point by tagging
- Think not naming names protects you from defamation
- Think it’s all about you.
Do:
- Express disagreement in a polite, non-inflammatory way
- Know when to walk away or refuse to be drawn into a discussion.
A final word As I said in my previous article on digital leadership, we all leave a digital stamp … even if we’ve deleted it, everything we post online is there for life and others will use it to form opinions of us and our businesses. I’ll leave you with a reader’s response to “Social Media Etiquette: What Should I Do If My Ex Keeps Bashing Me Online?”, an article that appeared this time last year in the Huffington Post:
Remember: some people call them posts, attorneys call them ‘exhibit A’ ~Charley D
