I Refused to Give My Best Employee a Promotion… and I Regretted It

Let me start with this… I regret that this is a story in my arsenal of business stories. 

But for years, I had this one employee in my business who I absolutely REFUSED to promote. 

She was my very best worker. 

She got everything done on time — and she did it exactly how I wanted it done. 

She worked overtime hours. Morning to night, pretty much every day. 

Anytime I needed something, even at the last minute, even if it was inconvenient, even if it was maybe a little unreasonable… she was there, ready to get it done for me. 

NEVER complained. 

Rarely made a mistake. 

Accountable. 

Driven. 

The perfect employee. 

And yet still… I wouldn’t do it. 

No to the promotion. No to the new title. No to the raise. 

In fact, I never even acknowledged her for all the work she had done, and how she had very clearly outgrown her role. 

Can you guess what her name was? 

Suzi Dafnis. 

You’re looking at her. 

Me, myself, and I. 

When You’re the Business Owner, No One Gives You the Promotion

There isn’t a higher up who can pat you on the shoulder and give you that raise. 

It’s all on you. 

For years and years, I was the hardest-working employee in my own business. 

And by employee, I very much so mean it. 

I wasn’t ‘owning’ anything. Let alone leading. 

I was firmly in the doing role. Head down. Across every single detail and truly indispensable to every decision. 

Because that’s what I thought I had to do. 

It’s the kind of isolation every single woman business owner creates for herself — because who else can do it, but you? 

Here’s What I Know Now

After over 30 years as a business owner myself, and having helped thousands of other women grow and scale their businesses, this is one thing I can say for 100% certain: 

If you don’t change your role, your business WILL swallow you up. 

Because it grows. 

And if you stay in that same role, you simply will not have the capacity to let it grow. 

You’ll cap it. 

You won’t be able to lead it fully, in the way it needs to be led. Or think strategically about your growth. Or make the kinds of decisions that need more time and energy, because guess where that energy is going? 

Into tasks like editing reels and managing your appointments and redoing work and all of these tedious items that don’t actually need your level of expertise. 

But Here’s the Catch… Most Women Don’t Ever Make That Shift 

Not because they aren’t capable. Not because they don’t have the ability to create systems and structures that would free up their time. 

They don’t change their role because of something FAR harder. 

Their identity. 

Your identity, that woman who started the business — scrappy, resourceful, figure-it-all-out, do-it-better-than-anyone version — has become SO familiar that stepping away from that feels foreign. 

Because what if things fall apart without me? 

What if I’m actually horrible at leading… and just someone who is very, very good at doing?

What if I find that I’m not as needed as I thought I was? 

What if others view me differently if I’m not doing the ‘hard work’ in the weeds? 

What if I view myself differently? 

The Identity That Got You Here Has a Ceiling. 

The woman running a $100K business is not the same woman leading a $1M business. They make different decisions. They carry different things. And most importantly… they see themselves differently.

It doesn’t mean that the identity, the woman you were who started your business isn’t absolutely extraordinary. 

She worked SO hard. She figured it ALL out. She made it HAPPEN, made it become real. 

But she’s hit a ceiling. 

Because the skills that built your business are now holding your business back. 

I see it in the woman who still won’t call herself a CEO, even after years of running a successful business, managing a team, and making decisions that have kept it all moving for this long. 

“We’re not that big,” she says. 

As if the size of the business is the qualification. As if the title belongs to someone in a fancier office with a very official sense of their own authority. 

But you’re already doing the CEO’s job. 

It’s time to shift the way you think about yourself. To shift your role in your business. 

Because There’s a Cost If You Don’t

I want you to imagine for a moment. Let’s do a little “thought exercise”, okay? 

It’s this time next year. 

Nothing has changed. 

You are still the one every decision comes back to. Still the one your team can’t move without. Still the one who can’t take a proper holiday without having the damn phone on you at all times. 

You’re still spending your energy absorbing your team’s stress, on top of your own.

You’re still overthinking decisions that should take 5 minutes — but you just don’t have the time or energy to think clearly. 

And you’re still missing out on opportunities (podcasts, speaking events, LIFE events, traveling, family time, all of it) because you’re too busy. 

Now read that back, picturing 5 years from now. 

10. 

How long are you realistically willing to do this much for? 

How to Change Your Role in Business, and Become the Leader

I have seen women make this transition. 

I have been through it myself, at multiple points.

And it is the most LIBERATING feeling.

To be able to make the decisions about who you are going to be in your business is freeing. 

It’s uncomfortable to make that shift. It’s honestly quite vulnerable. 

But when you do, you get clarity that changes how you make decisions. How you communicate your vision. How you execute on that vision. The impact you create. What you choose (CHOOSE) to take on. And what you finally get to put down. 

Every single time, the woman on the other side says some version of the same thing, just like I did: 

I wish I’d done this sooner. 

I’m running a 4-week Lab to take you through this process. It takes most people months, if not years, to shift into a new role. 

But inside The Leadership Lab, you’ll get the fast-pass to go from the ‘doer’ you are now into the leader you want to be. 

You’ll learn how to inspire and lead your team, so they aren’t just listening to you — but they’re actually taking initiative and ownership of their roles. 

You’ll discover how to pinpoint the particular mistakes you’re making in your leadership style currently that are causing you to be the bottleneck. 

And you will walk out, after 4 weeks, a different leader with a different business. 

Here’s what one of our lovely Leadership Labbers (from our March cohort) said: 

“I really wasn’t sure what Suzi was going to teach me that I didn’t already know.

Then, I used Suzi’s three-part framework she shared with us in week 2 of the Leadership Lab to brief my team on the biggest project my business has ever taken on. A project that will generate hundreds of thousands of dollars in annual recurring revenue.

I had never briefed my team like that (I just didn’t know how).

And the difference was immediate.

They understood exactly what we were building and why. They moved quickly. They showed up in ways I hadn’t seen before.

And this project — our biggest yet — is now running more smoothly than anything we’ve ever done before.

That one framework was worth my time and money spent on Leadership Lab — many times over.”

The Leadership Lab starts on 3 September. That’s very soon. And we won’t have another cohort opening up until 2027. 

So, if you’re ready to become a different leader, and walk out with a different business after 4 weeks, join us. 

Join The Leadership Lab — Starting 3 September

Here’s to building your business, your way, 

Suzi 

P.S. We keep these cohorts small and spots are filling up. Our last cohort was capped at 15 women. So if you’re interested, I recommend grabbing your spot asap.